Sunday, September 28, 2008

The Plan

I'm not feeling so great. DH & I talked for a long time about our options, and although he said he was excited about our next steps, I'm filled with dread & worry. I'm really shocked at the price of the injectable meds. I had heard they were expensive, but I thought that meant $300.00 or so, not $3,000.00. I'm not sure if that figure is correct, because all I know is that on the sheet I was given of what a typical IUI w/injectables costs, it said $3,200.00 each time. I'm assuming that includes the medication, but on another sheet it said that the medicine alone would cost $3,500.00 each cycle. So, I've got to get that sorted out.

Assuming that the procedure + meds will be in the $3,200.00 range, we can afford for me to do an IUI 3-4 times. This will mean that some of our money that's earmarked for our Roth IRA retirement fund will be siphoned into the TTC fund (there's not really a TTC fund, but there might as well be). If those attempts are not successful, then we are done. We can't afford to try any more. After a year we can start the adoption process. This is all breaking my heart. It's so much pressure, and i just want to be a parent, but I'm just feeling this pull to try the IUI & just see if it would work. Adoption is so close to my heart, yet I'm just not ready to give up on being able to be pregnant.

I just don't know that I can wait a full year to adopt. My poor husband, he thought he was being so great when he went & worked all the numbers and came up with a plan, but all it resulted in me was bawling. I mean, if we did 3 IUIs in a row, had zero success, we could still possibly be parents in 2009 if we adopted. But, he just doesn't see it happening. I have to find some other ways to go about this, because I don't think he gets that I CAN NOT wait any longer. We have been trying for 2 and a half years. There is no more time left.

6 comments:

Ariella said...

I am sorry. I don't know if meds are included in injectable IUI but I know for a Femara IUI they weren't. I am behind you what ever you guys decided and wish you the best of luck on your journey.

Alison said...

One step at a time Marisa... first IUI first... one step at a time.

Erica said...

We tried IUI, and the quote from our clinic for the procedure didn't include the meds. But they did direct us to a couple of places where we could get the meds, so we could shop around. I know the prices really vary from place to place. I know that it's all overwhelming, and expensive...and it's hard to decide how much money to spend on just trying to conceive. Just take a step back and remember that your goal is to be a parent and try to figure out which one of those options will get you there and then go for it. Just take a breather...you have time.

Erica

Anonymous said...

I think you should remind yourself that a year really isn't that long. I know it would be painful, but remember how quickly time flew when we were planning weddings? It would be like that. You would be getting ready for a child in that year, not just sitting idly.

I want you to know that I support you no matter what you do. If IUI feels right, do it. If not, you can still provide an amazing home to an amazing child. I'm sure you know that pregnancy isn't what makes you a mother, love is.

*HUGS* Keep blogging, just get it off your chest.

katd said...

Just go one step at a time. No pressure, no rush. And truly, if you're not ready to move to adoption, then you're not ready. Adoption isn't a fertility treatment. It is another way to build a family, but it's not a fertility treatment. It is so important that you follow your heart. No matter what you decide, you deserve to know that you did what you felt was right. Sending lots of encouragement and support your way!

Echloe said...

I am still astounded at the cost of fertility meds. It is just ridiculous that viagra is covered by insurance but fertility drugs aren't.

I hope that the IUIs work and you don't have to think abuot this anymore. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.