Wednesday, January 28, 2009

IUI canceled

I'm so devastated I can't even think straight. I honestly did not know how many follicles I had until my re called me. However, by coincidence, I was reading an article on cnn about the octuplets that were just born. Right in the middle of the article was a quote from my doctor. She was lambasting any doctor that allowed a patient to go that route... I knew at that point my IUI was going to be canceled.

I spoke with my doctor finally & she told me my #s:
17, 17, 17, 17, 16, 14,14,14,14 - Yeah, I overstimmed.

I'm not sure what route we're taking next, but as of now, we have to abstain or use condoms until after I ovulate... I can't even try to get pg naturally this cycle.

I'm hoping, hoping, hoping, there's a way i can get to Disneyland before my next cycle. I really need that place right now.

Long story short

Ok, I was writing a big entry about my progress this cycle, but it was
soo boring.

So, long story short - new cycle started - higher dose of medicine for
shorter amount of time - I've responded well - maybe too well - have
four large follicles, maybe five - yikes, multiples is a possibility -
ok with me, to a point - taking ovidrel/ovulation stimulation med
tonight - will have IUI on Friday, unless my estradiol levels are
really off - not sure what happens then.... - will find out soon - the
end. Oh, and 4 transvaginal ultrasounds in a row is sooo not fun!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Now officially not pregnant

I had a call from the doctor a few minutes ago. It's officially a BFN.

I'm too upset to write any more.

Thank you for keeping me in your thoughts.

Not official, but I'm sure it's BFN

I've POAS many times this week, including this morning. I know it's a BFN. I know.

I went in about an hour ago to have the blood draw for my beta & started crying. It's so embarrassing for me that I can't hold it in when I'm in public. I do so well most of the time...

Anyway, I guess they'll call me in a few hours, but even the lab lady seemed to be prepping me for a negative result.

I'm feeling so hopeless right now.

Monday, January 12, 2009

5 days until beta

Ok, I have 5 pg tests burning a hole in my bathroom cabinet... tomorrow I'll be 10 days past IUI...I think I'm going to test tomorrow. I just can't restrain myself.

As usual, I won't tell my dh unless... and even if it's + I don't think I'll believe it until I see it 5 days in a row, plus with great beta results... But, according to my dr, testing at this point wouldn't show the hcg still in my system from the trigger.

Anyway, I've been trying to keep myself so busy this past week. I stocked my 40 gallon aquarium (actually, it's s a little smaller, but I can't remember if it's 36 or 38, so I just round up to 40) with some lovely fish and have been enjoying watch them float around. Everyone's getting along great, which warms my heart. Unfortunately, I do have a bit of a mystery on my hands... one of my fish just disappeared (this happened before I bought the new fish). It's gone, and I have done a thorough search. I don't know what happened, but I have a small algae eater in the tank & I think he took care of things for me. How did he know that my least favorite part of having an aquarium is dealing with the casualties? Good fish! I just hope there isn't a scene like the one in Jaws 3... (you the tunnel... with the man popping up...egads!)

Also, I keep doing Google searches on symptoms, expectations, etc, and invariably I get directed to the inanity of Yahoo Answers. Today I entertained myself with this gem (it's totally made up - all this guy's questions are like this - but it still made me snort when I stumbled on it):

When a man gets pregnant can he get another woman pregnant? Or is he basically nuetered during this time?

So - I won't be updating probably until Saturday when I get the beta done - but please keep me in your thoughts!

Sunday, January 4, 2009

IUI went a-ok

Just a quick update... (with just enough TMI to make you queasy)

I had my IUI on Saturday. It was easy-peasy. We stayed the night at a hotel right next to the clinic and that worked out really well, plus the rate was only $60.00 (maybe a little less).

We dropped dh's "specimen" off at the lab, and then we came back to the hotel for another 2 hours.

When I came back I had to pick up the washed and ready to go specimen and hold it until my doctor came in to the exam room (it was in a test tube). Then the doctor, the nurse, and a new doctor came into the room. I appreciated that the new doctor didn't get up all in my business; she stayed towards my head.

My doctor reviewed my dh's semen analysis, and said it actually wasn't perfect (I think the motility rate is a little low, but most everything else looked great), and she thought because of this that having the IUI would gives us an extra push that we weren't getting naturally. My cervix was in a great position, and my cervical mucus was prime. So, other than just having that one follicle, I think I'm in a great position for success. That one follicle is keeping my hopes low, which is important because I do not want to get carried away with the what-ifs. Two weeks is a long time to obsess about all of this, and I've already bought 5 pregnancy tests in case I can't wait until two Saturdays from now. So I have an uphill battle with myself to keep my impulses under control.

The insemination was painless, in fact I felt nothing at all.

As I've mentioned in other forums, it was sort of a surreal experience having three people in the room with me while my baby may be getting conceived & not one of them was my husband (or even a guy).

So, that's the story for now. I really hope I have some good news to tell you in two weeks!

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Is the timing finally right?

Wow. I complained so much about nothing working out the way I wanted, I didn't even take in to consideration that maybe things happen for a reason. I know, deep, huh? Sorry, I'm sort of dragging from my exciting New Years Eve of watching our new (to us, and free) TV in bed with a small glass of TGIF's Mudlslide concoction and wondering why the hell our BIL was calling us after midnight (oh yeah, to wish us a happy new year!)

In any case, I wanted to make sure to get some of the stuff that's been happening written down before I totally forget.

On Saturday, the IUI is scheduled. Finally. Amazingly enough, the timing is about as perfect as can be. Almost all of my appointments for this cycle have taken place on a weekend day or on a holiday (there's nothing like spending Christmas morning with an ultrasound tech and her probe), which means I haven't raised any eyebrows at work. My last appointment was yesterday, and I just offhandedly mentioned to my boss that I'd be in a tad late. No questions asked at all. Plus, my husband doesn't need to take any time off from work, double yay!

At my appointment yesterday I was told that I had just one "good" follicle. I was so sad to hear this, because I really thought I'd have at least two, plus the one I have isn't all that spectacular. Dr. H. told me that one is all they are really supposed to be aiming for (because of the risk of multiples), but the odds are greater when there are more than one. So, I took this as bad news and cried on my way into work. Eventually I bucked up, and right now am feeling excited.

In about 4 hours I'll take my trigger shot of Ovidrel, and then Saturday morning we'll head on over to the office. We've actually rented a hotel room nearby so my husband is a little more comfortable with the collection. I'm trying to make this as easy as possible on both of us.

Wish us luck!