So this weekend I'm not feeling very optimistic. I had a good acupuncture session yesterday, but it wasn't very reassuring. I brought in my temperature chart from this cycle so far, and she was silent for a long time, and after talking to her it was obvious that she didn't see anything that looked like ovulation. She really wants me to start herbs, but I've been very resistant. I have a pretty cynical attitude; and a pretty good bullshit detector, if I do say so myself ;)... so when people start trying to upsell me on anything I tend to smile politely & say "no thank you." So, that's what I thought this was, an upsell. She asked me the reason that I didn't want to try the herbs & I listed 3 true points:
1. My stomach is sensitive and I have a hard enough time with pre-natals (I've resorted to taking Flintsones vitamins & folic acid supplements).
2. I'm taking other medications & I don't know what the reaction would be.
3. We're on a budget (so I can actually raise this baby as a SAHM if I ever get there), it's already a stretch to my pocketbook to spend as much as we are on weekly treatments; and I overheard her giving the grand total of one acupuncture treatment, plus herbs to a new client, and the total was nearly $300.00 - I'm already having a hard time convincing my dh that this is worthwhile, adding another $100.00+ into the mix a month would not go over that well....
So, I told her my concerns, and she had answers for everything. I can try pills or teas for the herbs, many of her patients are on the exact same medications as I am & have not had problems with the herbs, and she thinks its so important that she's willing to give them to me as part of my treatment fee, so in essence - free. Well, "free" is all I really need to hear, so next cycle I'll try the herbs.
Today is day 21 of a my cycle & my doctor wanted me to get my progesterone tested today to see if I ovulated. I already know (think?) the answer is no, so my mind is already on the next cycle. It's got to happen one of these days, right? Right?
That leads me to an odd conversation I had with Dh. I was telling him about being disappointed that nothing is happening fast, and I want us to be parents so bad.
Dh: Well, how long have we been trying?
Me: (holds up two fingers)
Dh: Right - two weeks.
Me: No! (holds up two fingers)
Dh: Ok, Two months. Two years?? No, that's not right. I mean really trying. We weren't timing anything, we weren't even having sex regularly. Now we're actually trying, and it's just been a few weeks.
Uh, Ok... but it is sort of nice to think that maybe we are just starting! I was lackadaisical about the whole thing because I just assumed it would be easy & happen when it happened. So I'm a little more empowered and it feels good.
That still didn't stop me from being in a major weird funk last night that was only broken by begrudgingly going swimming. That felt good & I'm looking forward to more of it now the weather has turned.
One last thing, I read all of your comments, and thank all of you! One of these days I'll respond to any questions that come up in them, but my time on the computer is sort of limited until I get my laptop & don't have to share with dh.